Let’s Talk About: Kindness

NONE of this matters if we aren’t kind to the people we come across in our life. This includes every stranger, every family member, and even ourselves.

 

It is hard to be kind in every situation, but this is also why patience is so important. We must use the patience that we’ve been developing to assist in practicing kindness in all areas of our life.

 

In my opinion, there is never a reason to be unkind to anyone. Even if someone is persecuting you for any reason, kindness towards that person remains more effective than any other response.

 

This brings to mind the famous quote of Martin Luther King Jr., “Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that.”

 

In every situation, we get to choose how we respond. I urge all my readers — please, respond with kindness! And do it without expecting anything in return!

 

You will not believe how this will change the perception people have about you. People will want to work with you, support you in your endeavors, and be your friend. Who doesn’t want more people to be their friend! 🙂

 

For me, this is a bit easier to practice because of how I was brought up. I’ve been raised with faith in Jesus Christ and what he’s done for us on the cross. I know that many people don’t always care to read about others’ belief in God and his son Jesus, but it’s the Bible that is the source for a lot of the knowledge I hold.

 

A Believer or not, the Bible teaches forgiveness and grace – what better way to describe kindness. If someone is cruel to you or treats you poorly, respond with forgiveness and grace and choose KINDNESS! Christ is a perfect example.

 

WHY KINDNESS IS IMPORTANT

 

It could transform someone’s life! Look, I know that personal development is technically a selfish subject, but the majority of people looking to better themselves personally have an idea of effecting the lives of those around them by first starting with themselves!

Kindness can melt a heart of stone! Be kind to everyone you come across because someday you’ll come across someone at their breaking point and you could save them from despair.

It could save your personal relationships. Being kind means being forgiving and gentle. Some people mistake this for weakness, but I see it as courage and strength. Nothing can save a marriage quite like kindness.

No matter how hurt you are by your significant other, forgive and forgive. Be kind and gentle – ESPECIALLY if you are the male in the relationship. Your significant other will reciprocate. It may not happen right away but don’t give up on it.

Your work relationships will thrive. The people you work with will view you as a resource for support. They will want to reciprocate your kindness with trust and support. And if you are a leader, your followers will be more open with you. Practice kindness daily and watch your work life transform.  Make it a habit!

There are many other reasons, but for the sake of the length of this post I will keep it to the three above. These three are more than enough to motivate someone to appreciate and practice kindness in their life.

 

HOW TO MAKE KINDNESS A HABIT

 

Goal Setting – Setting goals for being kind is not as arbitrary of a thing as one might think. Each day set a goal to thank the people around you for their support. Text your parents and thank them for all that they do. Reach out to an old friend and let them know you are thinking about them. Goals like these will eventually turn into habits that you will instinctively begin to do after practicing them for an extended period.

Establish Your Why – Write out why you are you are wanting to make kindness a habit in your life. Pull from this blog post if you want to! Writing out you ‘Why’ for this endeavor will serve as a constant reminder as to why you should be persevering in establishing this habit.

Smile More – This is an easy one! You know when you make eye contact with someone as you’re walking past them? Or when you look over at a stoplight and the person there is looking back at you? Instead of just breaking that eye contact right away why don’t you just give them a quick smile! This will have a massive effect on your mood and the person you are smiling at. THIS IS KINDNESS.

Always Say Thank You – Don’t just say ‘thanks’ then next time you get your coffee from the barista. Look them in the eye and say “thank you, I appreciate your help.” This sort of kindness goes a long way. It will improve your mood and the mood of those on the receiving end. Let people know that you really do appreciate their help.

Do Everything With a Purpose – Make it a habit to do everything in your life with meaning. Don’t ever passively answer in response to someone. Just like with saying thank you to those around you, take the time to give a thoughtful response to people. They are important and special individuals just like you! They deserve your attention. Help them passionately, serve them persistently, and help without expecting anything in return.

 

I hope that this blog post has been enlightening to my readers. Please share your experiences with being kind to others or being on the receiving end of kindness in the comments below.

 

Thank you all for reading. I appreciate your time.

 

What wisdom can you find that is greater than kindness?”  – Jean-Jacques Rousseau

 

 

kindness

Let’s Talk About: Having Patience

PATIENCE is definitely something I struggle with. I know I’m not the only one. It is however, a skill and an attitude that can be learned and put into practice.

For me, I have so many ideas, goals, dreams, and things I want to do it’s hard to stay patient while formulating plans, setting goals, and building the foundation for everything I want to do!

And that’s the part of my life I see myself in – the foundation stage. I’m laying the foundation for an awesome and grand life to come. It takes time.

So, in keeping with the general outline I have for my blog posts, let’s start with the first question that needs to be answered, “Why is patience important?”

OVERALL HEALTH

Alright, we all know that it’s unhealthy to be stressed, anxious, angry, and upset, right? Those feelings and emotions are the exact opposite of what it means to be patient.

Something I learned while writing this blog post is how much anger actually effects us in regards to our health. If you’re curious check out the link below to read more about the effects of anger in our life —

https://www.betterhealth.vic.gov.au/health/healthyliving/anger-how-it-affects-people

Crazy, right?

Patience is the antidote to all of this. I view patience as a tool used to combat frustration in my life. Often times this frustration leads to stress, anxiety, and then anger. So I like to think I’m attacking the root of all those negative feelings and emotions by using and developing my patience to keep my level of frustration suppressed.

With that being said, patience makes you an overall healthier person. Use patience to purge yourself of all negative emotions.

Think about all the areas of your life that make you frustrated, stressed, anxious, and angry — I guarantee you that more patience in that area will result in a healthier relationship with that aspect of your life.

ATTITUDE 

You all already know I talk about attitude a lot! It is the single most important aspect of personal development, IN MY OPINION.

Patience has a huge impact on your attitude.

*Situation*

A co-worker of yours messes up on a task and that in turns fudges up the task you’re working on – this might make you look like a dud with your responsibilities.

An impatient person may blow up at the co-worker or bad mouth the employee behind their back. Because of the impatience being deployed, your attitude towards the situation has become sour.

Not only will the individual not like working with you, but the people you gossip with will lose trust and respect for you — they won’t want to work with you! People will view you as someone with a short fuse! You don’t want to be that person, do you? Of course not.

Now imagine someone handling a situation like this who deploys patience! It would look something more like this: “That’s alright, I understand. Everyone makes mistakes. Is there anything I can help you with to make sure we get this done ASAP?”

And then, once the actual task is taken care of, a patient person will go back to that individual and ask, “Is there anything we can do to make sure this mistake doesn’t happen again? It throws a wrench in the process and I just want to help make sure things go as smooth as possible for both you and myself.”

The level of patience deployed effects the attitude of the person dealing with the situation. I can guarantee you that a good attitude in a situation like this will lead to more promotions, more economics, and more influence than could ever be achieved by being impatient!

EMPATHY

Isn’t it funny how everything seems to tie back to the attitude you take towards situations? Having empathy for someone is a result of your attitude which in turn is a result of the level of patience you deploy.

What patience does in regards to empathy, is, it helps us understand, relate, and accept people. With empathy we’re able to tolerate other people’s choices, actions, and words.

With empathy we try and really understand why people function the way that they do.

Patience helps us be more empathetic in our lives. We ask questions to be more empathetic in situations. We try to understand the mindset of others. We learn about others. We dig for the root to particular actions taken.

Patience effects the level of empathy we have in our lives.

According to Gary Vee, “Empathy. It’s one of the biggest things to which I attribute my success.”

 

How Can We Develop and Practice Patience?

Alright, let’s keep this straightforward and practical –

  1. Make a conscious decision to practice patience each day.
  2. Use the ‘Mel Robbins Technique’ – Countdown from 5 before taking an action or a decision. (Slow down!)
  3. Along the same lines, think about what you’re going to say before speaking. Take a moment and think on your response. This is a habit that can be developed!
  4. Study Patience – Seek knowledge on the subject itself! You’re off to a good start by reading this post.
  5. Learn to control your emotions. This is an incredibly massive undertaking. It’s a lifelong pursuit. Keep what my father always says on your heart – “Temper your highs and temper your lows.”

 

Patience is a very desirable character trait. I urge my readers to deploy patience. Learn all you can about the subject. I guarantee having more patience than the average individual can and will change your life.

I will limit this post to what I have already written, but I could go on for hours — why I love personal development. Please add your experience with the concept of patience in your life to the comments below. Also, offer suggestions on how to be more patient, how patience has served your life, and stories where having patience really benefited you.

Thank you all for reading my passionate thoughts and ideas – feel free to reach out to me at Nathan_Rech@hotmail.com if you want to connect further. 🙂

“Patience is not passive, on the contrary, it is concentrated strength.” – Bruce Lee

 

patience

Let’s Talk About: Being Thankful

TODAY is turkey day. One of my favorite holidays. It’s a day to relax, eat good food, and to see some of my favorite people. The day itself sparks thoughts about what it means to be thankful for everything in my life. With that being said, I would love to talk about what it means to be thankful and how to create the habit of thankfulness in our lives.

Being thankful means appreciation. Appreciation for everything in our life. Sometimes it can be hard to appreciate everything you have going on in your life, but I think it can be pretty easy when you realize that just breathing can be the greatest gift you could ever have. You cannot accomplish anything without being alive, right?

I think it is pretty easy to be thankful when we understand that if we are breathing we have the opportunity to make things better in our lives. Whenever I feel like I have an ungrateful attitude because of things happening in my life that seem to be negative, I go back to the basics. I look at the physical things around me and just acknowledge the life around me. I’m thankful that I even have the chance to change my circumstances.

So how do we create the habit of thankfulness? For me it starts with the quiet time I create for myself every morning. By waking up early before work and making time for myself I am doing something tangible in order to create a habit. Instead of just trying to convince myself in my mind that I am a thankful, I take physical action and put pen to paper.

I start each day off making a list of things that I appreciate in my life. Below is an example of a list that I made this morning:

          1. This day and it’s opportunities.
          1. My wife
          1. My family
          1. The friends in my life
          1. My career
          1. The lessons I’ve learned in my life
          1. My home
          1. Being in America
          1. Having the Opportunity to better my life
          1. Food to eat and being debt free due to working hard

By actually making a list every day I create an instinct and a habit of thankfulness in my life. This ensures that I remain an appreciative person each and every day.

Like most things in regards to personal development, being thankful has to do with our mindset and attitude. We can choose to have a grateful outlook or a “my situation sucks and it’s because of this or that” type of attitude.

This comes down to also taking responsibility for our own circumstances and not blaming others. It’s pretty hard to remain thankful for what’s in our life when we blame others for anything that may be negative.

With today being thanksgiving I think that we should all take a moment to reflect on everything that is on our life. Reflect on how we got to this point in our life and be appreciative of the opportunity we have to make our lives even more awesome than they are.

Happy Thanksgiving, everybody. Love on yourself and love on others.

“When you rise in the morning, give thanks for the light, for your life, for your strength. Give thanks for your food and for the joy of living. If you see no reason to give thanks, the fault lies in yourself.” – Tecumseh

Let’s Talk About: Challenging Yourself

No matter what anyone says, a challenge pushes and motivates people to be better. If you’re told you can’t do something, the majority of people will say “We’ll see about that!”

 

I believe that humans have an innate desire to prove to people that they are capable. Capable at what? Capable at whatever is relevant. If something seems difficult we want to try and accomplish the task and get past the difficulty. Why is that?

 

Think about it – every aspect of life in which humans are rewarded with something that makes them feel good or happy requires work of some kind. You want to buy a beer at the end of the day? You have to use money that you have left over after your bills that you earned. It took some sweat to earn all the money you have so you can buy that beer.

 

What about relationships? You want a fulfilling relationship with someone that you can trust and count on for the rest of your life? That definitely takes work. It is a 2 way street. So how do challenges actually help us to become better individuals? How do they make us more valuable in the marketplace?

 

Challenges help an individual grow and stretch their skills. Plain and simple. If you’re scared of something, challenge yourself to do what it is you’re scared of, and the next time won’t be so scary. Guess what? You just personally grew! Uncomfortable? The challenge here is to practice it until you are comfortable.

 

So how exactly can we make sure that we are constantly challenging ourselves?

 

#1 LOOK FOR A CHALLENGE:

 

This is one, that in my humble opinion, I excel at. I am always looking for something that I can dive into even if I know nothing about it because no matter how frustrating the process, in the end I will know what to do the next time.

 

It’s about getting out of your comfort zone. It’s about not caring about what others think about you trying. It’s about being okay with being reprimanded for ‘just trying.’ In your profession, in your relationships, in all areas of life; look for opportunities to attack a challenge.

 

#2 EXERCISE:

 

This one is crucial. Not only to your physical health, but also to your mental health. Look, not everyone likes to work out, I get it. If you are wanting to commit yourself to developing who you are to your greatest potential, you’re going to need to learn how to exercise in one way or another.

 

Exercise is incredibly important to our mental health because it has a massive effect on our resiliency. Working out builds the habit of perseverance, determination, and improving – literally you can see physical improvements pretty quickly.

 

There’s different types of workouts you can tailor to your preference and experience, but what matters here is that you challenge yourself. Every time you break a barrier with one more lap, one more rep, one more squat, you are completing a challenge you had put on yourself and succeeding. The next time, that rep that was once so hard to complete will get easier and easier.

 

Subconsciously, all of these physical challenges will carry over into your professional life and personal life. Your ability to persevere in challenges, look for new challenges, and succeed in new challenges will skyrocket.

 

#3 NEVER SETTLE

 

There is a difference between being content and settling in life. I think it is pretty important to touch on this and how it is relevant to challenging yourself. The way I see it, being content is being happy throughout the process. Being content does not mean that we are not going to try and improve our situations, it just means that we can still be happy with where we’re at.

 

I believe happiness is a choice. You’re not going to be happy ONCE you attain something. Being content means that you are okay with where you’re currently at because you know that everything is a process – ALL OF LIFE IS A PROCESS.

 

Now, the real enemy is settling. This is where you believe that you can’t do anything about your situation so there you think there is no use in trying. Or you just don’t want to try because of the identity you’ve placed on yourself – this goes back to attitude and self-talk.

 

Settling is inhuman. Our world is what it is today because we as society’s refused to settle. We wanted bigger, better, and more enjoyment in our world – and look how far we’ve come. This sort of thinking reigns true in each of our individual personal and professional lives.

 

Not settling means never saying no to a challenge that is relevant to you. Make the decision to never settle, to challenge yourself, and to always learn and grow in every way possible.

 

“Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.” – Robert F. Kennedy

 

challenging

Let’s Talk About: Stan Lee

TODAY I heard the news of the passing of Stan Lee. Being a massive Marvel fan myself I felt pretty saddened by the unexpected news. I guess we all could have guessed that it would have to happen sometime soon with him being 95, but Stan Lee had an energy about him that made people think he would never die.

 

I find Stan Lee to be an inspiring individual in regards to his accomplishments, wisdom, and determination. I thought it would be appropriate to write a blog post on what I admire most about the man himself.

 

#1 – He Was a Visionary

What an imagination Stan Lee had for the future of his comics. He had a dream, an idea, and a vision that he wanted to see become a reality. He had these visions for each and every character he created.

 

He wanted each character and every story to have an impact on his goals and his readers. Having to compete with the likes of DC early in his career, Stan Lee had to create a differentiating factor in his superheroes.

 

Forced to think out of the box, Stan Lee visualized superheroes that were like the rest of us. They weren’t from other planets and they weren’t alien creatures. These superheroes he envisioned struggled with every day challenges like the rest of us.

 

This vision created a revitalized comic era. These superheroes were flawed and more relatable. At the time Stan Lee didn’t know whether or not these characters would be a success, but him and the other co-creators had a vision for a new era of superheroes and they went with their guts.

 

#2 – He Inspired the ‘Little Guy’

Throughout his career and success there has been quite a bit of controversy on who actually created quite a few of the popular Marvel superheroes. Was it Jack Kirby or Stan Lee?

 

Now, there may be some people that know more on this than I do, but from my what I’ve gathered from being a massive Marvel fan is that Stan Lee often did the story creating and Jack Kirby did a lot of the actual character creation.

 

Regardless, there is often an inspiring trend in the Marvel superheroes. Take Spider-Man and Captain America for example. Both characters, prior to being superhuman, are individuals that no one would have expected to be super. Stan Lee thought it be fitting for them to be super considering there voracious desire to do right and sacrifice for the good of others. How are these characters not inspiring to the ‘little guy’?

 

Taking a quote from Alan Turing, the great World War 2 Mathematician –

“Sometimes it is the people no one can imagine anything of who do the things no one can imagine.”

 

#3 – He Worked His Passion

The man was working with Marvel until the day he died. He was involved in projects, new stories, and the vision for Marvel all the way up until his death. He clearly was on fire for the things that made him a legend.

 

I hear people talk about retirement quite often. I say, “Retire! How could you want to retire?” People want to retire because they are uninspired and they are not working in their passion. Stan Lee is an inspiration for those who are searching for their passion and a motivator for those who are already working in their passion.

 

Wouldn’t you like to be doing something you are so passionate about that you are doing it into your 90’s? I do. And for those of you who don’t know what your passion is yet, isn’t Stan Lee an inspiration for finding it? I want to be as happy with my work in my 90’s as he was. He inspires me to work my passion till the day I die.

 

“I’m happiest when I’m working. If I’m not working, I feel like I’m wasting my time.” – Stan Lee

 

#4 – He Was a Reader

“The more you read, the better you’re going to become as a storyteller.” – Stan Lee

Stan Lee recognized the importance of reading and how it related to his career. Now, yes, reading and writing go hand in hand, but I believe storytelling is incredibly important in any and all careers. Storytelling is an art that gives people an advantage over other individuals in the marketplace.

 

If storytelling is an advantage that will help me in the marketplace and I know that reading is what helps develop that skill, you better bet I’m going to read as much as I can. Stan Lee was an advocate for reading. He believed that it stretched your imagination, provided ideas, and taught you how to tell stories.

 

I think we should all take a note from Stan Lee’s life and discipline ourselves to read a little bit more.

 

Stan Lee has left an incredible legacy behind him. We should all strive to do the same. I’m inspired by the legend of Marvel and you should be to. In honor of Stan Lee, in the comments below tell me who your favorite Marvel Superhero is and why.

 

RIP Stan Lee – 1922-2018

 

 

stan lee

 

“To have an idea is the easiest thing in the world. Everybody has ideas. But you have to take that idea and make it into something people will respond to – that’s hard.“ – Stan Lee